Rob McCarter, MS, LPC/NCC
Eliminating the Barriers to Success
Over the years, I have been most fortunate to be one of those that God has called to aid others in eliminating barriers to success in their lives. In each situation, I help them discover their own resources and then get out of the way for their own resources to knock down the barriers.
While I could relay many success stories, there are a few people who can’t seem to knock down the barriers. These are the ones who experience fleeting success, if at all. Instead of eliminating barriers they construct them.
- Are you one who erects barriers to success?
- Do you know someone who erects barriers to success?
If you answered, “yes” to either question, then this three-part article is for you! Each part will focus on eliminating a barrier to success. Read, reread and digest each part and you’ll be amazed at the difference that will manifest in your life.
The first barrier to success is a lack of “know-how.” You must develop “know-how” or you will not be successful. This point cannot be overemphasized. New learning must take place if we are to be successful. As such, it’s essential that we look to role models for the “know-how”…to those who have blazed the trail before us.
Take the Fellowship of Christian Martial Artists as an example. Each member at FCMA joins with specific expectations and desires. Some desire to achieve blackbelt status, others desire that and more…maybe to run a school of their own.
- How many of you who desire to reach karate black belt status know Dave’s method for attaining his blackbelt? What did he do? What sacrifices did he make? How did he prepare himself mentally? How did he prepare himself physically?
- How many of you who desire to run your own school can relay “how” Dave built FCMA from the ground up? What did he do? What sacrifices did he make? How did he prepare himself mentally? How did he prepare himself physically?
What better role model at FCMA than Dave Clinard? I’m sure he’d be the first to admit that he has made his share of mistakes in building FCMA. Yet, through it all, he has learned from the mistakes by using them as feedback for success…as more of on-the-job “know-how” training.
Regardless of your goals at FCMA, utilize Dave’s knowledge and the knowledge of others at FCMA. This will increase your “know-how” and eliminate a barrier to success.
Eliminating the Barriers to Success
In Part I of this series on eliminating the barriers to success I shared with you the importance of developing the “know-how” for success. “Know-how” is essential for success! Rarely, if ever, will you be able to “guess” your way to success. But with “know-how” you easily eliminate the first barrier and are ready to face the second potential barrier to success. That being the lack of “want-to.”
- Do you have the “know-how” about an idea but haven’t followed through?
- Do you know someone who has the “know-how” about an idea but haven’t followed through?
If you answered, “Yes” to either question, then you or someone you know probably has a lack of “want-to” issue. A lack of “want-to” in and of itself is not the challenge; it’s how you resolve it that creates the challenge. Allow me to share a personal anecdote that will clarify this point.
Several months ago I received a job offer from an organization that employed trainers to conduct workshops within the corporate world. While this was an incredible offer I hit the wall of “want-to.” It was only after I compared the importance of the job to other aspects of my life (e.g., time away from home with active participation in my teenage son’s lives). As a compromise with the organization couldn’t be reached, I declined their offer.
The point: “want-to” barriers are there for a reason. To be successful (which includes peace of mind), don’t ignore the lack of “want-to.” Instead investigate the reasons behind it, as I did, and discover the source of the hesitation by asking:
1. “What is important to me about achieving black belt status or running my own school?”
2. “Is there anything more important to me that could interfere with my achieving this goal?”
3. If there is, then ask, “How can I create a compromise that will result in eliminating that barrier to success?”
It has been my experience that 99% of the time a compromise can be reached and this barrier to success is eliminated. But it’s important to address the barrier head-on.
Eliminating the Barriers to Success
In Part I and II of this series I shared with you the importance of developing the “know-how” and “want-to” for success. As before, I’m going to assume that you’ve gathered the necessary skills (“know-how”) and cleared up any conflicting desires so that now you’re 100% ready to (“want-to”) to attain your black belt and/or begin your school.
There is nothing to hold you back, or is there? Unfortunately there is one more barrier that must be eliminated IF you are to succeed in achieving black belt status and/or operating your own school. This barrier to success is the lack of “can-do.”
The degree of “Can-do” that you’ll exhibit is directly linked to the degree of success that you’ll realize. Hopefully for most of you this belief is strongly engrained in you as a result of the successfully eliminating the lack of “know-how” and “want-to” barriers.
Others, despite this success need more convincing in order to develop a “can-do” attitude. That’s natural and not a sign of weakness…that is if you acknowledge and utilize it as a springboard to eliminate this barrier.
In order to illustrate this point I’m sharing with you a brief excerpt from Dr. Bob Bodenhamer and my upcoming book, The Power of…. In this chapter, we explore the power of identifying limitations (e.g., can’t dos) and questioning their usefulness in our lives.
Limitations…occur when…one generalizes from the consequences of a single experience (or at most, a few) that all future experiences will have the same result….Limitations are directed inwardly, toward the individual. As such, limitations are particularly damaging to one’s self-esteem, confidence and ability to utilize one’s power. What would the outcome be if one were to say, “I can’t get ahead.”?
What would happen if you thought (or said), “I can’t get my black belt or begin my own school.”? YOU would face a barrier that would be impossible to eliminate because you would begin to believe your own LIE! A lie is what it is, isn’t it?
Of course it’s a lie. Turn on your lie detector and step into the truth. Face the facts, you have the “know-how” and the “want-to” now develop the “can-do” by asking yourself this question,
“What stops me from achieving my black belt (or starting my school)?”
This simple question honestly and thoughtfully asked and answered WILL lead to the elimination of the final barrier to success and propel you to a level of personal achievement that you’ve only dreamed about
Rob McCarter is a husband, father, licensed therapist, success trainer, and author. Rob’s books include: Optimistic Thinking: The Key to Success and Life Is Good! He can be reached on the web at www.RobMcCarter.com or at Carolinas Counseling and Consulting in Belmont (704-825-9998)